I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Don't make out with my wife yet
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize