You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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