i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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