My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Randomize
