Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
ok first of all what the fuck
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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