i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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