OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
