We're like a lot better than the average bears
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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