Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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