That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
