That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
