okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
