unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize