I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Randomize
