dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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