I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
