Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize
