I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize