I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
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