she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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