If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
