I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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