I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Randomize
