so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
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critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
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I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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