And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
