Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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