Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
