How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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