I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize