well most of my day revolves around power hour
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
