Someone shit on the floor
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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