It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
