All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
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you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
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Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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