That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
