apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing