your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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