I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
my poor anus
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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