i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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