hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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