Well apparently he's into motor boating.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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