i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
