Who did Billy Mays play for?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize