i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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