you traded sex for a burrito?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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