Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
