he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
