New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
