Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
