we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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