you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
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