I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Panties = found
Randomize
