I should be sponsored by Trojan
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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