I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
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Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
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This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.